I am trying to find my place in the world. Two years ago, I changed jobs. I have always defined myself as a teacher. It's not what I do, it is who I am. So when I moved to the district office, to the "dark side" as my teacher-friends called it, I felt a bit lost. A few months after changing jobs, my husband and I made the choice to buy my childhood home. He was all in, and I was hesitant. Life, I know, is always about change, but I am just so tired of moving forward. There is something to be said, too, about breaking out of the world you know. Am I making my world too small, to move back to where I began? The move was hard. I left my neighbors and friends, the people who have known my children since that very first day. The first day we walked into church as a family of six, all my little boys were wearing boots. One of them had pee down the front of his pants. Buzz cuts and new socks and hesitant smiles. We walked into that room and said, "Hey. We're parents n...

I’ve been an Innovation Specialist for one year; here’s what it has taught me. I have been an Innovation Specialist for one year. In this time, I have only scratched the surface of what it means to have this role. I am beginning to understand teachers and students at higher levels. On a given day, I have brief moments in which I believe I have cracked the code: I know what to do and I know how to help and I can acutely see how one small pivot will make a difference in our school district. And then, a little hiccup hits the next day and I realize just how little I know. In the past year, I have been in 5 schools, dozens and dozens of classrooms, and held individualized learning sessions with teachers and teachers and teachers. I love it. I work in Google Drive and Facebook and Twitter. I work from my phone, and my MacBook, and my iPad. Every day is different because every day is focused on meeting the needs of my teachers. There are quiet days where I can focus on the project...

During my ten years as a classroom teacher, I kept a bright orange poster on display that asked two critical questions: Do you know it? Can you show it? Part of my new job as Innovation Specialist includes rethinking professional development for our school district. At the forefront of this conversation is that of micro-credentials; the platform being offered by Digital Promise is most interesting to me because it allows teachers to show what they know in a public way. In February, as I was preparing to apply for my new job, I started exploring. I signed up for an account at Bloomboard and tagged credentials of interest. I started a few. And then stopped. I was overwhelmed. I doubted myself. I ran out of a time. I originally read the details of each micro-credential and felt confident that I could demonstrate my proficiency. Then I became scared. Today, my office is quiet. Most of the staff has gone to a conference. This morning, I sat down at my computer and complet...

I am packing up my classroom bit by bit and folder by folder. Most of the contents of folders are ending up in the recycling bin. They were good ideas at the time, but so much time has passed since I first stepped into this classroom. I have to cherish the teacher I have become while not losing sight of the teacher I was. I treasure my time as a new teacher. I value becoming a veteran. I have classroom war stories, like the time a student climbed up my wall of windows like a monkey, just to see if he could. Or the time that students kidnapped Bear and left a ransom note in his place. All good things. Bear is in desperate need of help. My first year teaching, students completed tasks whose answers were completely “Google-able.” There were enormous point values attached to each. 100 points for a book project. Students earned points simply for completing the project. There were no standards. The 2006 ELA core was “new” and the targets were simple. We were learning, all of us tog...

While cleaning out my desk I came across a piece of my writing from 2009. I thought I would share it here. :) What Do I Want Out of Life? In the long run? A home A family A Friday night date Someone who loves me more Than I have ever loved A goodnight kiss Hot chocolate at midnight A miracle Early morning breezes And bike rides Pumpkin cake and cream cheese frosting Little wiggly toes to tickle. Laughter at bedtime A tiny someone who has my eyes. Peace.

Today, June 29, is the year mark from the day I became a mom. My entire life has been a series of tender mercies. I am still convinced that I was given my scholarship to Westminster simply because Heavenly Father knew that as a teenager, my tendency was to give up if things were too hard, and He knew I needed to be a teacher. When I moved to Nephi, I was given a great job simply because the Lord knew that I needed to be HOME in order to sort out the mess I was making of my life. It worked. Shortly after falling in love with Blaine, I became his Mrs. without hesitation. Our relationship is now and always has been EASY. We knew that we could build a happy life, that we could build a beautiful forever and so we did. We are. We found an incredible home with room to grow. Purchased at auction, we marveled at the home and tried to think of how we could possibly fill five bedrooms. A tender mercy. In February of last year, my sister called and talked to me about a possible ...

It doesn't happen often, but sometimes I have dreams about babies. A few weeks ago, I was having a dream so lovely that when the alarm sounded, I asked Blaine to let me keep sleeping so I could see it all the way through. What was so great about the dream? I was holding a crying baby. This little bite-size was SCREAMING up a storm. I was rocking her and holding her and trying to calm her down. With no luck. My mom came into the room and stood behind me. She put her arm on my arm and reminded me that the baby was used to a heart beat. She told me that I just needed to hold her a little closer to help her calm down, that if baby could hear and feel my heart she would relax. I held the little girl close to my body and it worked like a charm. It was such a tender assurance, to have my mom next to me, showing me how to be a mother. And even though this little tiny one was crying, it was a dream and not a nightmare because there was something so comforting, standing there, rocking ...

When I was in college, I read Gift from the Sea . I was too young to understand it, and I realize that I should take another look now that I am an adult and also a wife. In the book, the author comments on different items found along the seashore. She finds the item, describes it, and then considers lessons that can be learned from the item. For the past few days, Blaine and I have been in Santa Monica. We travelled here with our two younger brothers, having rented a little studio apartment on the beach. We can look out the window and see the ocean. This morning I went hunting for sea glass. There is something graceful and lovely about a piece of glass, a piece of garbage, really, that has turned into a treasure because of the tide. Blaine was looking for bleached white shells and rocks when I joined in his search. Right near his feet I found the most fantastic piece of blue glass. It is my favorite shade. I felt like it was fate, to find such a piece of glass right near ...

Today we had our second home study. That means that we have been on this adoption journey for one year. I scrambled like a mad woman, cleaning our already clean home. I hassled Blaine, talked him into loading the dishwasher, clearing his stuff off the desk in the office and helping me make our house smell less like teenage boy (We've had a lot of brother-visitors lately). :) Our lovely caseworker walked into our front room and no where else, so all the cleaning was in vain. Last year, when I was prepping for my home study, I was convinced that I absolutely needed to have a table runner. You know those strips of fabric that run down the middle of a table for no apparent reason? I needed one. I tried to make a mockup using fabric scraps and wood glue. It was not pretty. It looked as sad as it sounds. My mom, sensing my urgency, came over to my house, threaded my machine, and gently and patiently helped me sew. I think it's beautiful. I think she's amazing. This ye...

My Mr. is even more incredible than I realized. It IS possible to be busier than I thought possible. I am not nearly as patient as I need to be. Life is good and we are blessed.    Anticipation is fun. Possibilities are endless. "It" will happen when the time is right. 

I have been a Primary teacher for the past few years. I like it a lot because it gives me a chance to know kids in the ward that otherwise would be strangers to me. And, I am learning all sorts of lessons about love and patience and what it might be like to teach my own children gospel principles. Last week during the final meeting, we had a mini-lesson that gave every person in the room a chance to stand up and "fill in the blanks" of the following phrases. It was beautiful, and I decided that I would use it to frame tonight's blog post. My name is __________________.  I [like to] __________________, but most importantly I am a child of God.  I like the idea of it, this one simple [and enormous] thing that everyone could testify of. Tender. My name is Krystle. I like to wash dishes and organize things, but most importantly I am a child of God. My name is Krystle. I make mistakes more often than I would like, but most importantly I am a child of God . My...

It's been a good day. Nothing particularly earth-shattering, just a quiet feeling of peace that everything is going to be okay and life is lovely. I think that sometimes the Lord blesses us with good days so that we can endure. We are given little glimpses of beauty, little tastes of pure bliss because then, when we do have to see the bad, have to endure the bitter, we have a memory of a more delicious time, of something delightful. And we know that more of those good moments are ahead, so we can get through the moments that aren't so good. Yep. That's what I think. It's been a good day.

Maybe Baby, It's gonna be quieter around here for a bit. We're done writing these daily messages. I just thought I'd let you know that even when the messages end, we will still think of you every day.  The difference is this: the messages we have for you from this point out will be kept in our hearts, not published for the world wide web.   The last and biggest message we have to share? We love you, and we will try to wait patiently until we meet you. __________________________________________ [We are hoping to adopt. You can view our It's About Love Profile  HERE .] [Read about this series and read the other messages  HERE .]

Maybe Baby, Your mama is amazing.  I love her to pieces.  She is really funny and makes the most adorable faces.  Sometimes she catches me looking at her and blushes.  I love it.  Your Mama is so special to me I wanted our proposal to reflect that.  Let me explain. For family-home-evening. My dad would always find a classic movie for us to enjoy: Sabrina, Singing in the Rain , or a recent John Wayne purchase (dad's favorite). In these movies the woman was surprised when the man would propose.  It was always a shock but a no brainer that was the answer to their situation.  I would ask couples how they got engaged, went ring shopping, and did everything before he proposed. I wanted special, I wanted old fashioned. Driving home on a special Wednesday from Salt Lake, I dropped by Wilson Diamonds, and picked out a ring. On the drive home I arranged to talk her dad to ask his permission and blessing. I also arranged the prop...

Maybe Baby, How do I know what lessons you need to hear until I see your face and hold your little hand? I don't. How do I know what advice you might need when you are an angst filled teenager?  I don't. Right now, I spout off vague silly wonderings, not really knowing what you will like to know or what you really need to get through life.  Heavenly Father places people in our lives who are exactly what we need. I have a friend who makes me laugh. I laugh at everything she says. I have a friend who brings me back down to earth, who helps me see the logic when I am feeling crazy.  I have another friend who I only see once a year who can still manage to see right to my heart. When you and I find each other, I will do my best to help you learn and grow. I will teach you things I have learned to save you from the hard lessons. I want to be someone who makes you laugh, who brings you back to earth, and who can sometimes see right into your heart. Is tha...

Maybe Baby, An elephant...made entirely of pumpkins and gourds! We attended the Pumpkin Walk in North Logan this weekend. "Elephant in the room" is a metaphor for an obvious truth that is either being ignored or going unaddressed.  There's an elephant in the room right now. Blaine went in to the hospital this morning. He goes every so often because he was born with CF, a condition that makes his life harder than I would wish on even my worst enemy. He's been up late at night for the past few nights coughing, unable to rest like a person needs to. It's the elephant in the room because I sometimes forget that he doesn't feel well. I don't ignore it on purpose, but we live such a normal life that once in awhile I forget that things are not entirely normal.  Sigh. It's gonna be lonely. ______________________________________________________ [We are hoping to adopt. You can view our It's About Love Profile  HERE .] [Read ab...

Welcome! :) Maybe Baby, The home we live in is pretty awesome. When we bought it we could tell that it had been abused. We worked together to show it that we loved it. When we first got married, we lived on mostly bare floors from May until September. Your dad and I woke up every morning and found a new project to do. Now, the projects are slowing down, and we just get to enjoy the space and the pretty room. When we were working, our rooms had funny nicknames, like the mold room, and the pee closet. Gross, huh? Just try to think of why they were called that. When we had our home study, the adoption case worker said that our garage was HAZARDOUS. We're working on that project next. :) Our front yard used to look like this. Now it looks like this.  Our kitchen used to look like this. Now it looks like this. Our dining room used to look like this. Now it looks like this. Our home is a blessing,  just like the thought of you. _...

Maybe Baby, I just thought I'd warn you. Your Maybe Parents love each other, and sometimes we will give each other kisses in public JUST to embarrass you. Funny, huh? Consider yourself warned. Love you.

Maybe Baby, You are surrounded by people who love you, and none of us have even met you yet!  People have stopped in to look at us all month long.  As of right now, we have had  11,711 different views of these messages. Can you feel the love? If you can't tell, when you arrive, you will be joining people who love you already and are excited to meet you. One of my good friends reminded me of this: "Your maybe baby isn't really a  maybe . . . he or she is just making a fashionably late appearance." I like that. Love you. _______________________________________ [We are hoping to adopt. You can view our It's About Love Profile  HERE .] [Read about this series and read the other messages  HERE ]